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Originally uploaded by theurbankazoo.

The Orange Kazoo : 09/26/2004 - 10/03/2004

Friday, October 01, 2004

 

Another Day...Another Stupid Bitch....

I saw Pink coming out of the local Walgreens a couple of days ago. She was short and unattractive...and she looked like a bitch. Plus, why was she at Walgreens? Something to ponder on, but I know for sure it was her.
Not much is going on here. I'm not going to do a really long post because I'm angry right now after watching the latest Real World. I feel like joining the Black Panther Party and shooting some pigs if you know what I mean.

Monday, September 27, 2004

 

Skeet, Skeet, Mosucka!

Aww, man. I went to my former blogs today and did a little reminiscing. It was so much fun. http://urbankazoo.motime.com and http://eatyofamous.motime.com
I thought I'd update on my new life goal. Bryn and I decided that the only thing we can do with our lives is publish a book. No, not Sad Ponies, but Why the Fuck Are You Talking? Here we will give tips on how you too can shut the fuck up. One idea I had today is that if you're a stupid bitch and say things that don't interest me, you should commit your life to giving oral pleasure to others. That way everybody wins AND you won't have the time to open your mouth and say stupid shit that will upset me. Yes, I'm becoming a bitch and I like it so shut the fuck up.
I'm having a bad day. I even made the comment, "I'm so mad I want to shake an infant." What a horrible thing for me to say, right? Yeah, I know. Hopefully I'll improve my attitude and limit my use of profanity by tomorrow. Hopefully not.
This city is making me bitter. It's a cold city with cold people and now I'm just one of them. All that's missing from me being a complete San Franciscan is that I don't smoke, I shower, I'm not taking estrogen, and I haven't stopped giving to the homeless. I will always do that. They're my favorite people. The only thing is, I'm noticing that I'm starting to give money to homeless men in order to raise my self-esteem. If you give them dollars, they tell you how gorgeous you are. Remember that when you're feelings down, sistas.
I gave a tip at a restaurant. It was stolen by an Asian lady who was walking by the restaurant. I love this.
To make my day even worse, I have that Jewish rapper's songs stuck in my head. You don't want to spend your day rapping the words, "Holla back at your Jewish boy, fo sho." You won't make friends easy.
I absolutely adore Flava Flav though, and that makes my life worth living. I'm very mad at Brigitte for breaking the cat's heart too. Damn you, foreign woman! Damn you! Ryan Starr aka Raging Bitch from Hell is making me angry...Charo...ah, she is SO my hero!!! I love you, Charo.
This new Real World is proving to be a blast. I HATE EVERYONE. And since I love to hate now, this is a good thing.
My mother and I have decided to try out for Amazing Race. She has started lifting weights ever since I came up with the idea. I love you, Alma.
Have a good day, everyone....


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